The Inner Mind of Gill
by Radioactive X-Naut
Summary: Bea promised Gill SHE wouldn't read it, but... Well, I guess he didn't say anything about someone sitting on her and pinning her hands down while the contents of the his diary were recited across the Town Square. Oh well, what can ya do. ToT, Crackfic.
1. Where's the Dairy?

Warning; some things may be exaggerated or may not exist in any way, shape, or form

Warning; some things may be exaggerated or may not exist in any way, shape, or form. Viewer digression is advised.

Also, I shall be calling Akari here after my farmer in the game (Bea, lol), as her name's short, and I can't remember all of the Japanese names. D: That, and Angela is a do-not-want name for Akari, I'm sorry. D: -shot-

Waffle Town Hall

"Gah, it has to be around here somewhere…"

Pale fingers which obviously seemed to be void of all touches of sunlight flicked nimbly through the file folder, the horror that was attached to them shuffling about impatiently.

…. Oh, wait, right, the hands are attached to the arms, not the capris. I need to brush up on my anatomy. Back on topic, the man we came to know and love as Gill had finished an unsuccessful search on said file folder, and moved on to tearing through the rest of the bookshelf, murmuring angrily to himself as he did so.

Of course, this ruckus did not go unnoticed by his fellow employee Elli, who turned and watched the poor boy suffer as he dug desperately through the oak-carved case. Books on a multitude of subjects stacked neatly on the floor, appearing surprisingly untouched by the rate that you'd expect them to be flying out at.

Well, the occasional magazine, as well as Mayor Herbal's personal collection of… what appeared to be dolls of the townspeople came flying out, but what harm would that do?

… Well, she could have sworn she had seen a screaming Calvin fly past the window, but that was probably just the doll. They looked disturbingly similar, after all. The screaming was Gill in a smooth baritone… Right?

Hesitantly, Elli turned her eyes away from the sight, ducking closer towards the underside of her desk to avoid any stray objects that may possibly come flying her way. She had no idea what he had been searching for since they had both arrived for work five hours ago, but all her offers of assistance were rejected.

She heard him mutter countless times about a Diary though. Perhaps he was keeping track of some important, top-secret files for the island in a pocketbook. It was understandable. The boy began murmuring again, which she decided to ignore.

"Agh, Goddess, I won't accept it! My diary WILL be found!"

Just as he had taken a doll that looked strangely like the local farm mistress, the brunette suddenly stumbled into the door, seeming to have trouble breathing. With that, Gill seemed like he was ready to jump out of his shorts out of surprise. Glancing around in an uneasy manner, he glanced at the doll before gently placing it back on the bookshelf, backing away a few paces. The woman's posture relaxed a good deal and she took a moment to catch her breath.

"Phew! I wasn't sure WHAT was going on there for a minute. Anyways--"

"Were you listening to what I was saying?!" He demanded, catching the poor girl off guard. Racking her brain for a moment, she remembered vaguely hearing about this something as she came in.

"Erm… I'll find it for you?" She squeaked, backing a bit closer to the door.

"I don't need you to do that. I can't have you reading my Diary!" He roared, in a voice strong enough to cause the farm girl to go fleeing from the Town Hall. Elli sighed.

"Losing something important is no excuse for rudeness…"

"Go back to work, Elli. Everything's fine."

Waffle Town

"Hmmm… I wonder where it could be?..."

Enjoying the almost musical clacking noise her boots made against the slightly run-down cobblestone roads of Waffle Town, Bea skipped along in her usual cheery manner, despite the scare that she had just received moments ago.

Allowing her brown eyes to scan the area, she figured she'd look around Gill's house for the dairy he needed so badly- it was probably there. She wasn't sure what he wanted dairy for though- maybe he or Elli were making a cake?.. Ooh, a cool ice-cream cheesecake or something of the like would be lovely on a summer day like this. Mmmm… Dairy.

After a few moments of searching, she failed to find any dairy outside the house, but she did manage to notice a book laying on a grassy knoll a few paces away. Maybe it was an order sheet? It could probably tell her where the dairy was! Picking it up, she was caught by surprise as a rectangular shaped…thing fell from the sky and hit her in the head, bowling her over. "Owww… I'll never get used to these dumb things.."

Picking the object up, she read;

"_You found Gil__l's Diary! Go return it."_

"Wow. Stupid message thing. Spells everything wrong. Oh well."

Figuring she might as well return the book as well and announce her search for dairy was a failure, she scooped up the diary, which had fallen off to the side on impact, dusted it off, and put it in her rucksack. She then started back towards the Town Square. Maybe she'd put in a good word about Brownie Ranch while she was there. They had good dairy.

Waffle Town Square

After dragging herself up the extraordinarily long stairs, which she decided were the bane of her existence, Bea slowly stepped in the general direction of the town square, toddling like a drunk. "Oogh. I… have… to… not run… so much…" She panted, trying to shove away the feeling of being watched she had gained when heading upstairs.

Big mistake. Faster then you could say "Gil's Diary", poor Bea had found herself on the ground, a weight pushing against her back and something… sweaty… over her mouth, her hands also pinned down by some unknown force. In a bit of a panic, she tried squirming, but in vain.

"Mmph, Mmphh!"

"Gee wilikers, calm down B'! I won't hurt 'cha."

Glancing up, she noticed a pair of catlike golden eyes smiling down at her, a single blue hair detaching itself from the man's head and floating a while before landing and tickling her nose, causing her to sneeze. With that, the hand was immediately removed.

"Ewww! Was that necessary?" The blue headed young man whined, rubbing the cootie germs on the underside of his boot. Bea frowned.

"I guess so. Can you get off me, Luke? This seems…awkward."

"Not yet! I gotta see somethin'." He replied, sticking his hand into her pocket… of her rucksack, of course, and withdrawing Gil's Diary.

"Hey! Give that back! Thief!... How'd you know I had it anyway?" She struggled to free her hands from under the wrath of Luke's other hand, again in vain. He grinned, setting the book down on his lap and pulling out the rectangular thing from before. It seemed to be gradually fading. "I found this lying around while I was out to get somethin' for my pops. It hadn't fully disappeared yet, so I figured you got it recently. Anyways… Let's have some fun, shall we?"

Bea gazed in horror as Luke's expression gained a mischievous twist in appearance as he…

…Snatched up the plain green book on his lap and opened it. OH NO! He then began to read the first page out loud, his bold voice slowly faltering to that of confusion as he went along.

_Sunday, Spring 23rd;_

_Dear Diary;_

_Father was playing with his dolls and spewing stuff about mother in the office today. I felt like buying him a cup of Hot Cocoa, but he wouldn't drink it. He'd just give it to that new __farm girl who lives in the Maple River District. What does he see in her, anyway? I mean…_

"How rude!" Bea spat, continuing. "I think I'm a rather good farmer!"

Luke raised his voice and continued-

_FATHER, WHY WON'T YOU LOVE ME? I TRY TO BE THE MOST POMPOUS, MONEY-OBSESSED MAN I CAN BE!_

Here, Luke couldn't help bursting out laughing. Bea looked for an opportunity to squeeze out from under him, but if anything, he shifted and caused her to become even closer to the ground then she was previously. Was that even possible? Maybe she was going under ground…

…_Anyways. I decided that, since I can't become a teacher, as there are no children on this island (except Chole, but she alone wouldn't be a class's worth..) I should become a writer instead. Yes… a Non-Fiction writer. That's perfect! I don't know what I should call my book though…_

_Gill's Island? Hmm… I'll have to think about it._

"Isn't that copyrighted?" Luke asked, Bea raising an eyebrow.

"What do you mean?"

"Well…. Um, I donno. Never mind, I guess. That's all there is on the page…"

"Hey, what are you guys doing?"

The two flinched.

Uh-ho.


	2. Fabulous Gil

**ATTN**; This fan fiction was originally created, and is being raised on the Ushi No Tane forum. I forget about the version on here and update that one more frequently, therefore, while Chapter 2 is just being released on hurr, I have up to Chapter 9 up on there. xD That's why this one is a bit of a mess- FF dot net messed with the format slightly.

Thanks for listening. Try to enjoy Chapter 2.

----

[Waffle Town Square]

The sight that greeted them was in fact, not Gill. For, unless Gill happened to be peach-haired, purple-eyed, and orange-scented that day, the assumed human being standing in front of the two tapping his foot wasn't him.

They stared. He stared back. Luke began picking his nose. The others averted their eyes for a brief moment before resuming. Very focused little people, they were.

Unsatisfied by the silence, the new arrival broke it once again. "…Should I even bother?"

"Chase, it isn't--"

"We're reading Gill's Diary!" Luke interrupted, with a satisfied smile. "You wanna join in? I'll let you read the next page!" He grinned, waving the book in front of the cook's face... Well, more of his chest; he wasn't willing to get up and allow Bea to escape from under him. Chase's eyes widened.

"Wha? No! That's….You can read?...." He paused. "Well, okay. He wouldn't let Elli test the cake I made last Thursday."

"Great! Have a seat then!" Luke said, moving closer to Bea's legs to allow Chase some room. Chase stared for a moment before shrugging it off, not wanting to sit on the dusty cobblestone of the square. Murmuring a brief apology to the farm lady, he sat down.

By now, Bea was absolutely crushed under the weight, and, quite honestly, wasn't very comfortable in the least. "WHAT'S THE POINT OF THIS?" She managed to force out, somewhat strained for air.

"If I get up, you'll escape and tell Gill."

"If you get up, I'll have to kneel on the ground, and I'll get my good apron dirty. This has to last me the rest of the week, you know. The Inn ran out of detergent yesterday."

Bea groaned. "Could you two…. at least…. lose some weight…. then? I…. can't…. breathe."

After a brief pause, the weight on the girl's back lightened… only to double on her legs.

"Hey! What gives?" Luke spat, forced to crouch lower to the ground as Chase contented himself with sitting on the carpenter's back, between his shoulders. "The poor lady couldn't breathe." He stated simply, before opening the book and flipping to the next page.

Luke's angry little squeal of "Neither can I!" fell on deaf ears as the cook began reading.

_Tuesday, Spring 25th__;_

_Dear Diary;_

_Oh my goddess… I never thought I'd be saying this, but… I'M SO BORED. Nobody has shown up here all day, Elli's off sick, and Father went out to ask Dale if he could create a curve in his desk without damaging the drawers._

"Hehehe… Drawers." Luke snickered, staring down at the ones he was sitting on with a grin. Her arms now free, Bea managed to flop sideways at a speed nearly matching the strange rocket birds that fly around the village and smack him with the back of her hand.

"Ouch!"

"A-hem." Chase murmured, making an attempt to reclaim the floor as he continued.

_**Apparently**__, his figure has finally exceeded the wood, and now he can't fit without moving a few feet back in his chair. Though if he does that, his arms can't reach the desk… It's really quite the predicament. _

Chase stopped for a moment to snicker. "Hehe, Maya will probably have that problem some day." He remarked, Luke sticking out his tongue. "Hey! That's no way to talk about your future wife!"

Chase scowled, looking down at Bea. "May I?"

"What are you asking me for? Go for it."

….

Another "Ouch" from Luke later, peace was restored, and the reading was resumed.

_Anyways, I'm going to start my story now. I'm actually... a bit excited. Diary, if only you could talk, I'__d love your opinion on my abilities._

"… In bed."

Silence. "Just keep reading, Chase, just keep reading…" Bea groaned.

_-Gill's Island-_

_Prologue;_

_It was a dark and stormy night, and--_

"Wow. How cliché, even for Gill."

"Shush, Bea!"

_**It was a dark and stormy night**__, and the entire village was mourning the death of Sir Herbal, who had died from learning that fat is not a proper flotation device or something like that. The typhoon's winds ripped at the quaint, lovely houses of the village, causing a stir among the villagers._

_Terrified, they began to panic..._

"I would have thought a death would have caused more of a stir then a typhoon. We get the latter often enough that it's a casualty." The farm mistress murmured, Luke grinning. "I wouldn't be panicking! I'm a pretty cool guy. I'm not afraid of anything!" He spouted, attempting to flex from under Chase's weight.

"Please don't interrupt me." Chase sighed, keeping himself steady on his spot.

"_What will we do without Mayor Herbal? Oh, goddess, help us!"__ The people cried. "The goddess will not come, we ruined the island! We might as well abandon ship right now!"_

_  
"Calm down. Red Bull revitalizes the mind, remember? You dumb villagers only ruined the Goddess Tree on the right side of the island!" A voice said powerfully._

"…What does that have to do with anything?..."

"What's Red Bull? A type of cattle? Huh, Bea?"

"Shut it, both of you! He might tell us.."

"_Who was that???" The villagers cried._

"_It is I, the Mayor's Son." Suddenly, from out of the wind and rain, walked the amazingly handsome, muscular, intelligent, and overall hawt young man that made all the women in the area faint with delight. "My name is Gill" He said dashingly._

"I take that back." The cook sighed.

Luke, as usual, interrupted with his usual commentary. "If that pipsqueak is all those stuffs, they must be meaning less by the day."

"Well, Gill is intelligent.." Bea remarked, trying to shift herself to get a look at the page.

"Are you sure? He spelled "hot" incorrectly. Or maybe you were too busy fainting to notice?" Chase asked, examining the typo carefully for a moment before he and Luke burst out laughing. Bea growled. "Just keep reading."

"_Hurray!"__ The villagers cheered (well, the ones still awake anyway). "Tell us what we have to do, and we'll do it, Fabulous Mayor Gil!"_

"Fabulous Mayor Gil? Quite the title." Luke chuckled.

"Yes indeed. He's so fabulous that he forgot an "L" in his name…" Chase blinked, after checking again.

"Maybe it wasn't fabulous enough for him. There's only one "L" in fabulous after all."

_Gill smirked a devilishly handsome smirk. "Okay, what we need to do to revitalize the island is repair the rainbows. But to do that, we need to find the quilt. I know where one half is, but I can't find the other one. Will you help me?"_

"_Yes!" The villagers cried._

"_All right, let's revitalize the island!"_

_"Hurray!"_

_(To be continued!)_

_Well, what did you think, Diary? Great, right? That's only a taste too! Well, Father is back, so I shall resign for the day. Until tomorrow, Diary!"_

"… It ends there." Chase said, taking a deep breath. "That was weird."

"Awww, I wanna hear more! This is funny!" Luke whined, Bea looking over to the clock tower.

"Not if you want to keep your head you don't. Fabulous Gill gets off of work in twenty minutes…. Aren't you late for work, Chase?"

The cook twitched, gawking at the clock. "Argh, you're right…! But… If I keep my hide, can we resume this tomorrow? I think I had… fun today."

"Well, if Bea dosen't ruin it on us, I'll come back." He frowned, the two men looking at the farm girl, who was slowly caving under the mental pressure.

"…. All right. But somebody else has to keep the Diary." She sighed, feeling rather guilty for betraying Gill like this.

"I'll take it!" Luke said, snatching the green book away from Chase. "He'll find it if it's kept in the Inn."

The two looked at him. "Don't loose it." They said in unison.

Luke waved a hand, chuckling. "It'll be fine, I won't! So, 'till tomorrow."

"Yep, tomorrow."

With that, the three went their separate ways.

(… To be continued.. again~)


	3. Lock Your Door!

**[Dale's Carpentry]**

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN "YOU LOST IT!?"

Of course, the inevitable had happened, which is why you never trust an excited Luke with important belongings… More so if said belongings belong to someone else.

Dale and Bo had backed up further behind the counter for their own safety, leaving behind the poor carpenter to be cornered and fed to the wolves. Well, if an enraged Chase could replace a pack of wolves, anyway. He certainly had the volume for it. Luke, of course, decided to open his mouth to defend his honor.

"I mean it was "AN ACCIDENT"! Like… I bet you have accidents all the time when you cook!"

"WELL I NEVER—At least I cook better then you!"

"I don't wanna be a cook anyway!"

"Well, the dish you made for the cooking festival sucked chickens! Literally!"

"I said I didn't know it was still alive! Don't hate the player, hate the game!"

Deciding this arguing was meaningless, Chase took a deep breath and probably counted to ten or something. Letting out a deep sigh, he continued in a slightly calmer tone. Equally a bit whiny, but who could blame him?

"Bea is going to have our behinds cut off and mounted on the wall now! I'm certainly not taking her wrath alone." The peach-haired boy complained, and began pacing back and fourth, deep in thought. Luke gave a small whimper and gingerly touched his own behind. He had grown rather attached to it over the years, and would prefer to keep it off of Bea's walls.

Gray, who happened to be passing by at the moment, watched Chase though the window and sniffed back a single tear. Ah, the memories! The good old days didn't seem so far off again.

So, what WAS Bea doing at the moment? Well, she had problems of her own to deal with at that moment, and, thankfully for the two of them, couldn't attend the secret cult meeting of the diary tainted. How… lucky?

**[Brownie Ranch District]**

"…and WHAT, may I ask, were you planning to do with that on mine 'ere Brownie Ranch?"

"Um…" Bea stared down at her axe, where, this morning, she had found to be engraved with the words "Meet me at Alan's tree at 9:00 sharp. Don't be late". It certainly wasn't her doing, but… Running around with a gigantic meat cleaver at quarter to nine wasn't exactly a normal thing to do. Swallowing, and attempting to look Cain in the eye, as to not look like a criminal, she tried to reason with the large man.

"This is a misunderstanding. I was told to come here, and--"

"That's a lie, 'aint it? You came to hurt ma animuls!"

"No! Not at all! It's--"

Cain bent down to her level, to the point she could feel his hot, fish-scented breath on her face. He seemed to have the appearance of having puffed himself up to make the illusion of being more powerful… Almost like a frightened cat. It was then that Bea decided never to own animals. She backed up a bit, not enjoying the "glare of death" that was radiating off of him.

**"I KNOW A LIAR WHEN I SEE ONE!"**

"THEN MAYBE… uh…" Not to be outdone, she took a moment to find a way to combat this. After a few minutes of awkward silence, she snapped back-

**"YOU SHOULD GET YOUR EYES CHECKED!"**

Zing.

"A-hem.."

The two turned to the new opponent that entered the arena, to see the armor consisting of a sweater vest and the scariest capris you'd ever see. Cain backed up a bit, Bea breathing a sigh of relief as he did so. The larger man looked a bit puzzled.

"Gill? What're you doin' here? I reckon Hamilton sent y'all?"

"No, I came of my own free will to see the young lady you've been yelling at. I assure you, she meant no harm."

"Ah."

After another moment of silence, Cain left, leaving the two alone. Bea, rather embarrassed by the whole ordeal, felt the blood rise to her face. "T-thank you."

Gill smirked. "It's no trouble. Shall we? The tree is just up the hill from here."

…

Bea waited in anticipation as Gill cleared his throat. He then began to speak.

"I can't seem to stop thinking about you....and…."

Naturally, her heart skipped a beat; turning this into one of those lame romance fan-fictions you see everywhere. OH NOES, DO SOMETHING! WE'RE GOING DOWNNNN!

There was a pause. "Y-yes?" Bea stammered, unsure of what to say otherwise.

"…. I brought you here to apologize to you. I feel guilty about what I did, and I swear I'll never do it again…." He paused briefly. "Phew, it feels good to get that off my chest." He muttered, giving a contented sigh. Bea stared, absolutely lost.

"…. What?"

Gill raised an eyebrow. "I broke into your house a few nights ago. I needed to dig up some dirt on you for the Town Hall's files. You didn't notice?..."

Silence. Bea simply stared like a dear caught in headlights for a brief moment that seemed like hours before muttering a meek "No…"

Gill sighed. "You should really learn to lock your door, you know. Well, that's all. I should get going. I'll see you."

With that, he left with a pleased smile on his face.

Bea watched him go, before toddling down the hill in a drunken manner herself. The whole experience was exhausting; she had finished everything that needed her attention already, so a little nap would be wonderful to clear her thoughts.

**[Waffle Town]**

"Mm? What do you have there, Candace?"

The Lolita clad young lady sat down beside her sister on a bench outside the Sundae Inn. Tilting her head, she made an attempt to read the scribbled pen writing on the cover of the green book her sister was so engrossed in at the moment. The older sibling snapped out of her daze, and handed the book over as to allow her younger sister a better view.

"I-I found it on the road… I think… i-it belongs to Mr. Gill."

Luna raised an eyebrow as she flipped open the book, allowing her eyes to skim the first few pages she flipped though. "No kidding. I don't think anyone could be this obsessed with themselves… Unless…" Luna suddenly handed the book back to Candace, snapping her fingers.

"Bea! Of course! She's always seemed to have some sort of thing for him. Doesn't help her taste in men much, but… To make a diary about him? That's almost as stalkerish a level as you can get! It's kind of cute, really~" She sang out, Candace quietly shaking her head.

"No… I-I'm pretty sure Bea didn't write it. We saw her d-diary last time we…we… broke… in. It's a… pretty shade... of mahogany… not green. Plus, the general store… doesn't sell notebooks… so she'd have to import it."

"Oh, right, I forgot, Bea is as poor as the sun is bright. Oh, and she should really consider locking her door. Anyways. Should we read this?" Luna asked, waving the book about in her free hand. Candace became somewhat flustered. "I-I think we should return it… This doesn't seem right…"

"Nonsense! We're just borrowing it, right? We can return it and deny any proof when we're done~"

"B-but!..."

Too late. The horror had already begun.

_Thursday, Spring 27__th;_

_Dear Diary,_

_The Animal Festival is tomorrow. I want to enter, but… I don't have any animals. What to do?... Oh! Maybe I can bribe that Chiwahwah or whatever those dumb dogs are called into being mine. Then I could win!_

"A… "Chiwawa"? Wow… I thought they were just dumb mutts. Mutts put dirt on your nice clothes! I'm not sure if "chiwawas" or whatever they're called does that though. Whatever, all dogs are dressruiners." Luna commented, taking a breath. Candace said nothing.

_Today has been really busy. That weirdo farm girl even paid a visit. She gave me a cup of Tomato Juice as a peace offering and asked Elli if she could work with us at the Town Hall, I didn't think it was a good idea, but poor, naive Elli agreed._

_I was surprised. She didn't do that bad of a job…_

"A peace offering? I wonder what she did… Why isn't it recorded in here?" Luna demanded, flipping through the pages like stressed Gill flips though bookcases. It was a surprise the tender pages didn't rip. "Oooh! I just gotta know!"

Candace, meanwhile, was more preoccupied with supposed "voices" coming from the Shipping Bin a few paces away. Looking over at her sister, who was unfazed by this, she gently tapped her arm.

"_Why do I have to look like the moran?"_

"Um…"

"_Because you are one, and you lost it in the first place. Now hop to it!"_

"Luna?"

The pink-haired girl looked up. "What's wron-"

"**ASKJAHDJHASKHDAHDJ!"**

Luna was cut off by this… nonsensical battle cry, if it could be called that, and screamed as a blue haired individual figure sprung from seemingly nowhere and made an attempt to tackle her for the book.

A white bandana with red flames covered the bottom half of his face, hiding his identity just as well as those lame glasses hide Clark Kent's. She screamed. Candace flinched, and Chase snuck out from behind the shipping bin, his mind screaming in agony for a dictionary. When DID he become such a word nerd anyway?

He blamed Gill. Damn Gill.

**[House]**

Somewhat depressed, and frustrated at herself for getting her hopes up, Bea stumbled into the door, finding the scent of an overly sweet cake in the air. "Ah.. Home sweet home…"

Wait. She wasn't in the process of making cake! Nor was she humming! Turning to her kitchen, she spotted Maya taking what seemed to be a… somewhat unappetizing Strawberry Shortcake out of her oven. Upon catching Bea's glance, she smiled heartily. "Hey! Welcome home! I thought you might need this."

Bea returned her smile, though it faded as she tried to consider how Maya got in here.

… Oh.

She groaned. "Thank you, but… How many people break into my house anyway?"

A breeze from an open window blew in, catching her voice in some magical way and whispering it all over the island. Subconsciously, every man, woman, and child from the east shore to the west, to the north and back again, raised their hands in unison.

Maya sighed, setting the cake on the table as she headed for the door, her small braided pigtails bouncing as she shook her head.

"You really should lock your door, Bea."

**(To be continued. OH SHI--)**


	4. Where's Bea?

_ I KNOW I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO FINDS TAYLOR CREEPY. I mean.. I wake up, leave my house, do my chores, and he's running around the front when I get back. WTF.

Anyways…

**[House]**

The next morning arrived much quicker then the night that came before it. Funny how that works, yes?

"Let's go!"

Silence. Bea stared about in silence for a moment, bringing her arms down from the stretch they were in previously. She gave a small yawn, scratching the back of her neck in a lazy fashion. "Why on earth do I say that every morning?.." She murmured, taking a moment to try and remember. Nothing doing. How DO you break a bad text habit?...

Glancing over at the clock on her wall… it read exactly 9-oh-clock. She gave a small gasp. What? Oversleeping? Her? Nonsense! She hadn't slept a wink past six in over a year since she first gotten her house here. What?... Well, no use crying now. Figuring she should make breakfast, she wandered over to the kitchen to find several dirty dishes in the sink left over from the half-eaten cake Maya made last…..

OH.

That explained everything. Either that or it could have something to do with the emptied bottle of Toadstools she had been keeping around to make into soup for Crai- Never mind.

"Well, looks like I won't be getting out 'till noon." She sighed, turning on the water. Since the baked on…. Whatever you could call this substance… was left to dry on the plates without prior cleaning. Where was a sponge when you needed one…?

_**THUNK.**_

Taken off guard, Bea jolted, slopping the soapy water over everything around her in the process. She gave a displeased sigh upon noticing this, but her mood quickly brightened upon finding the sound- along with a string of colorful language- was coming from behind the door somewhere.

The side of one of her windows suddenly steamed up as a little blonde boy with goggles pressed his face against the glass, fogging it up slightly with his breath. Deciding to ignore the interruption, she turned back to her work, smirking.

Plan Table-On-Door-Action was a-go.

**[Waffle Town Square]**

"**BASSA BOOOOOOM! ZOTT! KABANKLE!"**

Luke screamed at the top of his lungs, causing the two listeners to cover their ears, and Jin to come running out of the clinic to shake his clipboard at them from a distance before returning back inside. A few minutes later, having sensed that the danger had past, Chase uncovered his ears and gained a more pensive expression.

"Hmmm. Let's see…. Uh, Comic book sound effects?"

"Nope."

Luke shook his head, the two men glancing at Luna, who had decided to come back. Her sister was too nervous to read in front of anyone but her, and stayed back today. Luna shrugged

"Um, a thunderstorm?"

"No."

Chase snapped his fingers, grinning.

"Oh! I know! Luke being a retard!"

This answer failed to please the carpenter- in fact, he didn't look happy at all. "NO!" He protested, his grin quickly returning. "I'm fireworks."

"Could've fooled me. Where's Bea? She should be here by now."

Luke shrugged. "No idea. But… I can't think of anything else."

"It took you three hours to think of your fireworks impression, so, I suppose that's understandable. But if she doesn't come soon, we may have to…" He paused, face twisting in disgust "sit on the ground."

"NO! I won't do it! I'll get my nice dress all dirty! It's very hard to maintain it, you know!" Luna protested, stamping her foot.

"Well, I can't sit on the ground! The Inn isn't getting more laundry detergent for another few days! I have to sleep in this you know!"

The two looked at Luke. Luke cocked his head to the side, obviously not having paid attention to the conversation. "What is it?"

….

"Ow! Gittof! You two are heavy!"

Chase sighed. "Please stop squirming, Luke. Bea was a much better blanket then you."

Luna shrugged. "I wouldn't know… though, who gets to read?"

"Hmm.. Well, since I'm me, and I read two days ago, it should be Bea's turn to read, but.. She's not here." He paused. "Well, since we're sitting on her.. Luke, you're Bea today."

"WHAT?"

Luna giggled. "That's the correct reaction. Though, wait… that means… EWWW! I SO DON'T WANT TO BE LUKE!" She squealed, Chase chuckling a bit.

"THAT is the correct reaction. Though… I suppose Luke can be Luke and Bea. You can be yourself."

"Oh!.. That's good to know." Luna sighed in relief. "Though if Luke is Luke and Bea… What would you call that? Beke? Luea?..."

Chase shrugged. "We can mix them together and call 'im Bulk. Seeing as Luke's here, he gets the most letters."

Luna nodded. "That sounds right!"

"HEY! Don't I get a say in this?" Luke protested, squirming in attempt to get free. He failed, which seems a bit sad. How much DOES Chase weigh anyway?...

From his pocket, Chase removed the diary he had reclaimed from Luke yesterday, having said 'I'd like to avoid any more losses in my life'. Whether he was being serious or joking was a mystery to most, however.

"Shush, Bulk. If you'll be good, I'll let you read the Diary if you want. Just remember to return it, okay?"

Muttering a slew of cuss words, Luke snatched the diary and flipped to the page which Chase had ever-so neatly bookmarked off as the one they were to be on today.

_Saturday, Summer 1__st__;_

_Dear Diary,_

_My favorite soap opera was taken off the air yesterday. It was terrible! I had nothing to watch during the downtime. Never I'll never know if Noa__h was overtaken by Eve's love for him, or if Kadd seduced him into a forbidden garden of sweet, secretive love… Oooh! It's going to kill me from the inside out…_

Luke then burst out into a fit of giggling. "No way! Gill watches soap operas? THAT'S SO GAY!"

"… Oh, and the box lunch Owen gave you this morning wasn't?" Chase asked, scratching his chin. Luke flushed angrily. "HEY! He just did that to be nice! It was probably just a gift 'cuse Pops and I fixed up the top floor of that dingy shack of theirs…" He folded his arms, before speaking so Luna couldn't hear "and how did you know about that anyway?"

Chase shook his head. "You'll learn. Anyways… Luna, do you know anything about this soap?" He asked, noticing her frown. She gave a small nod. "Yup! It was called "Valley of the Sun". It was one of my favs…" She sighed. "There was a writers strike that put it off the air." She sighed. "It's a crying shame anyway"

Chase gave a nod. "I see. Well, Bulk, if you please."

"Stop calling me thattttt." Luke whined, but continued anyway.

_Well… I know I promised I'd write Gill's Island, but…__You can wait a little longer, can't you? I feel like writing something else today. Like… an alternate ending to VoTM!_

"Picky little guy, isn't he?"

"Artists usually are."

Luke raised an eyebrow. "Gill is an artist?"

"No, but let the boy pretend."

_Okay, let's see here…_

_-Valley of the Sun(Alternate ending)-_

_Slowly, Shangy approached Eve, who was gazing wi__th worry upon her beloved Noah, who had battered himself to try and earn the love of his friends. Maria and Kadd stood by, not knowing what to expect. Kadd, ever watchful, kept one eye on Noah though, ready to leap in if Eve got fresh with his precious uke._

Luke's face slowly began to redden as he took a breath and continued.

_Nobody noticed Shangy, who was overwhelmed with desire for love of his own, as he grabbed Eve and--_

"Okay, you are NOT reading the rest of that." Chase growled, snatching the book. His face was tinted a rather nice shade of cherry red, matching Luke's crimson shade quite nicely. "W-why not? We were just getting to the good part!" Luke complained, Chase shaking his head.

"I don't think poor Luna wants to listen to the perverted, assumed virgin mind of Gill." He sighed, looking to the girl. "Do you?"

She shook her head, a bit flustered in embarrassment. "Um, not at all, well, um, I'm going to go." With that, she stood up and began towards the stairs as fast as her designer shoes would take her. "Um, see you later."

Luke's head sank to his arms. "By the looks of how detailed that was at a glance, Gill has a few secrets I wouldn't mind knowing…" Luke murmured, only to have the wind knocked out of him by a low kick from Chase.

"Ouch! What was that for?"

"Because you're an idiot." He grumbled, looking to the clock. "Gill should be out soon. We spent too long waiting for Bea today…" He sighed. "Maybe tomorrow we can read without interruption." He sighed, snatching the diary and beginning down the stairs himself.

"Not likely, Chaseypoo. This year's fireworks festival is tomorrow." He chuckled, and began strolling off himself. Chase froze as he passed.

"…. Chaseypoo?"

**(To be continued..)**


	5. Checking Our Stocks Part 1

Lawl, I'm mixing up the festivals. -fails it-

O: I figured nobody read this but those on Ushi, but ah well. Enjoy Chapter Five. xD

**[Waffle Town – Cream Beach]**

Ah, Beach Day. The supposed "festival" started to recognize the first day of summer. However, it had been delayed for the past few days after an odd incident causing half the villagers to fly away. Wonder how that happened?

Bea sighed and leaned back on the cushion of her chair… well, if an empty cardboard box lying in the sand could be called that… she was sprawled over, tilting her straw hat further over her face to shield her eyes from the sun.

Because all good farmers begin to doze off in the hot sun, even if they're supposed to be working and doing productive things, ne? She couldn't be blamed, in her personal opinion, however- I mean, after a month or two of cool, somewhat damp weather, who wouldn't welcome a hot, sunny day, with people enjoying themselves to the sound of the ocean lapping against the shore..?

"OH SHI-- **CHASE**! COME QUICK, I THINK THE COACH DIED!.. AND IT CRUSHED THE TABLE!"

"WHAT?"

Somewhat alarmed by the sudden voices, she opened one eye lazily from under the hat to see… hairy legs, and the bottom of what she guessed to be Luke's swimming trunks. Who else would get white with flame designs? Taking her eyes away, she noticed another pair of feet come into view, whom she assumed to be Chase.

The carpenter, for some reason, began stamping his foot, causing some sand to fly into her face. Of course, she instinctively shut her eyes again in attempt to avoid the barrage of grit.

"Cut it out moron! She's not dead! She's--"

"THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS, FLOUR BOY!"

"Wha-- Care to call me that again, Blockbrain?"

"WELL, uh… **PUT A SHIRT ON BEFORE YOU BURN, PASTEY**!"

…. Yes sir, what a beautiful day.

Bea tugged her hat down over her face in a somewhat failed attempt to avoid getting sand in her face from being on the sidelines of a sudden and probably-started-by-Luke fistfight that broke out within seconds of the last comment.

It would take the appearance of Owen and a tasty bowl of Banana Pudding before all was calm and right on the beach once more.

….

"Um… Guys?... I… think I've… fallen and… can't get up."

Bea sputtered between words, making an attempt to get the several grains of sand out of her mouth in vain. The box, having mysteriously disappeared from where it was supporting her head moments ago, had left her lying on her back in the dirt, completely buried in what one would guess to be at least three feet of packed sand.

The muscular redhead glanced down upon the farmer and frowned. "Need a hand, Bea?" He asked. The girl's expression gained one of the most thankful, yet delighted looks of which none had ever seen. Unfortunately for her, before she could even sound out a "yes", Luke broke in, wagging his banana pudding covered spoon back and fourth.

"Uh-uh-uh! Nothing doing! If you remove Bea, we'll be without a couch for our secret sexual innuendos!"

Owen raised an eyebrow, giving Luke a confused look, a slight shade of red tinting his face, his red hair making his head appear to be on fire. "Innuendos…?"

Chase groaned. "I can't believe you can say that without shame…" He took a moment to take a quick glance around in case Gill or, anyone connected to Gill, was around before speaking quietly "He's lying, obviously, don't worry. But if you promise not to tell Gill--"

"We're reading his diary!" Luke announced triumphantly, at a volume a bit inappropriate for the situation. With that, he plunked himself down on poor Bea, who coughed, groaned, but otherwise, had probably given up on ever becoming free. Chase face palmed. "Ugh…"

Leaving the group for a moment, he came back with a makeshift beach bag made from what appeared to be napkins and duct tape. Way to go! Setting it down, he promptly began to dig through it. "I know it's in here somewhere."

Owen seemed to have a great deal of difficulty taking this all in.

"You're reading someone's diary?.. Okay, even if it IS the mayor's son's, that's NOT COOL! That's his" He paused a moment to attempt to hold back a snicker "Personal thoughts! You might get voted off the island or something if he catches you!" He lectured in a somewhat… illogical, yet logical sense, which caused Luke to shift uneasily and Bea to cough again.

Chase appeared unaffected. All parties turned to face the holder of the book of their slowly growing cult. He simply smirked.

"Well, we just won't get caught then, now will we?" Sitting down beside Bea (well, her head anyway) he placed the book turned to the day's chosen page in front of her nose. "I do believe it's your turn to read. I'll cut you some slack and turn the pages for you, seeing as your hands seem to be… trapped at the moment."

She gave a small nod. "Only if… Luke gets off… my ribcage…"

….

After Luke sprang off the compacted sand to take to sitting on what he guessed to be her legs instead, Owen sat down, and peace was restored. Bea took a quick glance around to assess her attentive entourage of shirtless men before turning quietly to the book. "_When did I become a lady pimp again?..." _She murmured, Chase glancing over at her with a raised eyebrow.

"Speak up, would you?"

"Oh! Right, sorry."

_Monday, Summer 3__st__;_

_Dear Diary,_

_I had a dream last night for the first time in a while.__ I was at work, and Bea came in to show me and Elli something she had dug up in her garden. It was so strange- it was like a flat box, only you could flip it open to reveal a screen and several little raised squares with all the letters, numbers, and symbols in the English language printed on it!_

Chase blinked, also confused. "Do you know of such a thing, Bea?"

Bea shook her head. "It was his dream, not mine. I have no idea."

Luke grinned. "We have to go on a TREASURE HUNT later then!"

"Oh, no you don't! I don't need you digging up my garden **AGAIN**! That set me back for weeks on end last time!"

Luke made a face and folded his arms, knowing by now that there was usually no reasoning with this girl. That and he still didn't want his behind mounted on her wall. "… Phooey."

_Well, after a few minutes of staring and poking at the letters, silly Elli pressed one of the buttons with a weird symbol on it and it woke up. Everyone took lockdown procedures and hid under the desks._

_Then Ben came in and began jumping around on the squares before leaving. I was shocked! He seemed so real-- I was happy to be able to see him again. Bea got up to look at the glowing screen. Her eyes widened, her face turned a pretty shade of cherry red, and she fainted. Silly Bea._

"Ooooh, Bea, you silly pervert you! Did you see some good Gill porn?" Luke cackled, a red faced Bea squirming angrily in her sand case. Seeing as she still couldn't free herself from under the weight, she gave a pleading look to Chase, who promptly slapped him (much to Owen's displeasure) before turning the page.

"OUCH!"

_Hesitantly, I got up to look for myself. __I didn't blame Bea for her reaction-- there were titles to a couple dozen stories… With my name in many of them. But the thing that really set me off was one labled "Gill x Juli". I wasn't sure what the "x" ment until I poked it and the screen blanked out, only to come up with the writing itself…It was… ROMANCE. I felt woozy, I think I passed out, and then I woke up._

"I wasn't aware Gill felt that way about Juli." Owen stated, scratching his chin. Luke and Chase murmured and nodded in agreement. "It's a story, so whoever wrote it would have to have concrete evidence." Chase added.

Bea just groaned.

_Moving on, Diary, toda__y is the day I write chapter one of Gill's Island! Yes! I'm as excited as you are~_

"WAIT, CHASE! Before you turn that page, keep in mind that that book is a living, feeling, and emotional being!"

Luke squealed in a faux-drama type voice, before tipping backwards and falling over, howling with laughter in the sand. Chase simply shook his head, sighed, and turned the page normally. "He- I mean Gill- is taking up a lot more page space then usual." He commented, Bea nodding. "He could use the backs of the pages, but…"

_Well, let's get started._

_-Gill's Island-_

_Chapter One- A Rival Appears!_

"**DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUN!"**

"…. Owen?...."

"I just wanted to feel included…"

_The search for the quilt was going well. Many of the villagers had figured out that the Quilt was probably jammed in the clock tower, but only Hamilton had the key. How were they going to get it?_

"OH! I KNOW! THEY'RE GOING GRAVEROBBING!" Luke yelled out, pumping his fists in the air. He then high-fived a puzzled Owen and looked over at a somewhat stunned Chase and Bea. "Continue."

_Luckily, Gill had Majik puwarz and pofed the key to the tower into his hand. "Thus will solve all our probkelms" He said._

Chase groaned, rubbing his temples. "Does anyone have a dictionary?" He asked, Owen raising an eyebrow. "Sorry Chase, but.. who brings a dictionary to the beach?" He asked, somewhat surprised to see a dictionary dropped in front of the group. "Ah? Thank you." Chase muttered, picking it up to go about looking for the word "puwarz".

Unfortunately, he was unaware of the metal detector toting, dictionary throwing, pasty sun-screen slathered problem at hand, which caused the entire group to exchange uneasy looks. "dun dun dun..?" Owen murmured, the group closing in to hide Bea's head and the book. Minutes of silence passed.

"What are you guys doing?" The voice asked in a suspicious tone, Chase having just failed to find the word "probkelms" in the dictionary, still unaware of the danger. "Oh, we're--" He took a moment to look up from the dictionary, somewhat puzzled by the lack of Luke commentary. It was then he was exposed to the horror, which caused him to go slack-jawed like the others.

"We're….uh… checking our stocks, Gill."

**(To be continued. DUN DUN DU- -shot)**


	6. Checking Our Stocks Part 2

Lawl, we have a guest speaker today~ Say hello to Hana!

Who, of course, is not my propertay, rather, belongs to Nekokidd~

Nekokidd is a member of Ushi No Tane. Sorry, the fanfiction was origionally written there, and I was taking requests for guest appearances back in the day.

**[Waffle Town – Cream Beach]**

"Oh, really now, Mr. Chase?... What stocks have you been investing in as of late, may I ask?"

This took Chase a moment of play-acting, pretending to look down at his "folder" which was placed ever-so-confidently behind him and the two other men, who were still recovering form the shock. Gill waited, tapping a clogged foot against the sand, but strangely, the sand seemed unaffected.

After feeling that he made up a good acronym, Chase turned to the Mayor's Son with a newly found smug disposition. Right then, let's talk business. Serious business.

"Well, I have a share in "Servers Agricultural Production." That recently went up." Chase announced boldly, accompanied by a smirk which silently boasted its message well. _Beat That. _

"SAP?.."Gill just looked bewildered before going through his bag for a notebook of the town's funding. Flipping through the pages, he absentmindedly spoke, suspicion dripping from his words like ice cream from the cone on a hot summer day.

"Are you sure you're not trying to bamboozle me?"

Chase shook his head, giving a small gasp. "No, no bamboozlement here. I'm offended that you'd even suggest such a thing."

Luke appeared to have recovered quite nicely, and his face had brightened as if he was about to laugh. A warning glance from Owen was enough to reduce this to an upset pout, however. More minutes of silence passed after that, minus the ocean and the soft sounds of pages flipping as Gill's concentrated stare seemed to burn holes in the paper (he actually did too at one point, which Luke muttered "was kinda cool").

Through this, Chase never dropped his proud stance. He knew perfectly well that "SAP" didn't exist, but hell, the captain goes down with his ship. Well, so Pascal had always said, but he had his doubts. He'd paddle away as soon as the water reached his ankles.

At long last, Gill closed the book with a scowl. The group waited in anticipation for the results, minus Bea, who didn't have much of an idea as to what was going on, aside from the fact that she had heard Gill's name. The man in question, after a period of silence, began to speak.

"Mr. Chase… This round, I'll admit you've wo--"

"**BANANA SPINACH SLUUUUUSHIIIIIIIEEEEEEE!"**

Poor Gill was cut off and manhandled as Luke, more hyped up and obnoxious then usual from being quiet for so long, screamed this phrase as he scooped up the Mayor's son like a surfboard and went dashing down the ends of the beach with him before anyone could say anything.

Other villagers on the beach stared for a moment before going back to their business. Obviously, they wanted no part in these shenanigans.

"What the-- **UNHAND ME**!" Gill yelled, his voice somewhat muffled by Luke's arm. He sniffed, struggling in vain against the carpenter's son. "AND CONCIDER WEARING DEODORANT FOR ONCE!"

Gill's last words fell on deaf ears as Luke screamed the word "**GLADLY!" **at him and sent him flying low over the waves.

Of course, this was only a figment of Luke's imagination, as in reality, he wasn't that strong. Really, he just dumped Gill in the slushy, low-tide sand before running back to the group like he had a dog nipping at his heels.

The cheery look on his face, directed towards his confused, slack-jawed friends, indicated that he was probably expecting to be praised for his work. "The guy's surprisingly light, what can I say?" He smirked, flexing his muscles, which appeared scrawny and girlish compared to Owen. Sadly, everyone seems to look scrawny and girlish compared to Owen these days. That man needs more chocolate dipped fried things. Said redhead frowned.

"Luke, why did you have to-- OHSHITHESGETTINGUP! RUN!"

Luke and Owen then ran screaming like frightened schoolgirls that day, leaving Chase and a buried Bea to deal with an extremely pissed off Gill by themselves. The cook worked franticly in those five seconds that Gill took getting to his feet, which was enough time for Bea to free her hands and push herself out as Gill ran at them, roaring.

"Gill! Stop! Please!"

No reply. "He's too angry to listen to reason." Chase pointed out, Bea groaning.

"Thank you, Doctor Science! Now hurry!" Bea urged, not bothering to dust her sand-coated clothing off as she snatched Chase's wrist and dragged him halfway across the sand before he got the idea and started running. He glanced back warily, obviously unhappy with how much distance the angry boy had got on them.

"Where are we going?" He asked, somewhat puzzled by the fact that they were dashing up the stairs towards the Town Square. Was she crazy? They were too big to pretend with the posies. Her reply was brief.

"You'll see!"

**[Waffle Town Square]**

"I still don't see what we're doin-"

He paused as he saw her use her free hand to withdraw a watering can. He groaned.

"Oh, you HAVE to be kidding me." He complained as they dashed towards Daren's Tree. "He'll catch us for sure now!"

Indeed, Gill was already clamoring up the stairs as he spoke. You could almost hear him seething.

"I know what I'm doing!" Bea panted, dumping the majority of the can on the green flower that grew under the tree. "Daren, I know you're there!"

With that, a little man dressed entirely in green appeared in place of the flower, a rather displeased expression on his face. "Bleh!.. So c-cold!" He then looked up at Bea with the expression of someone who had just been woken up from a peaceful sleep. Which he had been.

"No time to explain! Does the badge work for two?"

"Do you have a visitor pass?"

"A pass? Where can I get one?"

"Oh, I can sign you up for the week, it only takes a few minutes.."

Chase, feeling this was getting way too out of hand, yelled out "We don't even **have** seconds! **LOOK PAST US**!"

Indeed, Gill had found his way up the stairs and was charging up the side of the hill with gusto. "**GOOD GODDESS! HE'LL TRAMPLE US ALL**!" Daren squealed, latching onto Chase's shoulder.

"OVER THE RAINBOW! WAY UP HIGHHH! THERE'S A, PLACE HE WON'T GET US, UNLESS HE LEARNS TO FLYYYYY!"

Nobody bothered to question his Broadway singsong screaming, rather, just dashed over the colorful bridge like it was just another road. Rainbow Road.. That sounds like an interesting name. A racetrack, maybe?

Many people would be going crazy that day from seeing people running on rainbows. Mostly Gill, who was in fact, not a friend of the Harvest Sprites. Nor could he fly.

He would be found in a tree below a few hours later, completely unharmed. Very angry, but completely unharmed. Serves him right for running off a cliff. I thought he was supposed to be the logical one.

**[Gull Island East]**

"Wait… You can hear him?"

Bea asked, looking at the little green sprite perched on her knee. He seemed a bit stronger then when she had last seen him- he could evidently leave his spot now. Or else the three of them wouldn't be sitting on the grassy piece of land, catching their breath after the lengthy sprint they had performed. Chase cocked his head to the side.

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Well, I thought only certain people could see Harvest Sprites.."

Daren chuckled. "No, silly! Everyone can see Harvest Sprites. We just pretend to be flowers so everyone will ignore us. We're like ninjas! We hide in our surroundings." The sprite explained, performing a few martial arts moves from where he was standing. "If they just watered the flowers once and a while _(which they don't, greedy jerks)_ they could see us too!"

Bea nodded, somewhat disappointed that she was no longer special. "Oh, okay."

Thinking for a moment, it was somewhat awkward being on a beautiful remote island alone with Chase. Almost a bit... romantic, she supposed? She wondered what Maya would say.

Chase, on the other hand, looked worried. "Ninjas… OH SHI-- I FORGOT THE DIARY!" He turned to Bea, the same urgent expression on his face that was there when they were eluding Gill. "We have to go back before anyone finds it!"

Bea sighed, placing the little Harvest Sprite on the waiter's shoulder. "You're going to go gray early from the stress this one day seems to be giving you." She warned, dashing up the rainbow, Chase not far behind.

So much for secluded romance.

**[Waffle Town- Cream Beach]**

After re-planting Daren and saying farewell, Bea headed over to the beach to meet up with Chase, who had simply darted past her when they got to dry land. He was surprisingly fast for a man with hairclips and an apron.

Seeing as he was still bent down, sifting around through the sand while muttering to himself, she assumed he had yet to find it. Hesitantly, she too bent down to look with him.

"Ergh, where can it be?"

"Are you two looking for this?"

At the sound of the familiar-yet-unfamiliar voice, Chase and Bea looked up to see another brunette dangling the infamous green book in front of their noses. Chase immediately lunged for it, but the woman stepped aside, and ended as a belly flop in the sand.

Guess who today's couch is?

…

"So, your name is Hana, right? I heard about you from Luna." Bea smiled, the other female nodding. "Yep! I'm thinking of setting up a salon here. Some people look like they could use the work around here." She replied, glancing down at Chase and twisting a clump of his wildly sticking out hair with her finger. "You should really let me fix these split ends for you. For you, it's free!"

"No!" Chase sulked, burying the bottom half of his face in his arms and glaring out to sea. Bea frowned, shifting her weight closer to the sand. She knew what it was like being the couch- the weight wasn't pleasant at all.

"So, why do you want Gill's Diary again, anyway? Shouldn't you return it?" Hana asked, Bea thinking about this for a moment. "It's… complicated." She declared, Chase giving a brief nod of agreement.

"Is that so?..." She asked, flipping to the page that was marked off, covered in sand. She brushed this away with her fingertips, and noticed a finger had replaced the sand. "We ended here before an… untimely interruption." Chase said, before returning his arm to serve as his pillow. The female nodded and started reading.

_Luckily, Gill had Majik puwarz and pofed the key to the tower into his hand. "Thus will solve all our probkelms" He said.__ The villagers cheered as Gill walked over to open the clocktower. But alas, nothing was there but the gears. Frowning, he restarted the clock anyway, but he was somewhat disappointed that their efforts were futilez. Seeing at night was time for sleeping, he sent the villagers home to rest up._

Bea sighed. "You know, I sort of like it better when Luke's here. It's too quiet without him." After a moment, Chase slowly nodded, as if considering the consequences. "I suppose. It wasn't the same when Luna was here either.."

"Luna knows about this too?" Hana asked, blinking. "I'm surprised she didn't tell me. There's no secrets between us."

"I wasn't aware of this either. Am I being replaced already by younger, probably more attractive females, Chase?" Bea asked, appearing… wait, was that jealousy in her eyes? Though it could be frustration. You wouldn't want a loli moving in on your manwhores while you're keeping your house locked, would you?

Chase shook his head. "No, of course not!...." Glancing at Hana, he muttered for her to keep reading. She simply giggled.

_Though as the Fabuliss Gil returned to his home for the night, he was passed by the new farmer in town, who dashed up the stairs past him, saing a quick "Hello" to him as she did so. He nodded, and kept going._

_That night, he watched as a rainbow was painted off the side of the dark hill, cutting thru the stormclouds like a nife through Brownie Ranch Buttah. __Gill clenched his strong fists in rage. He had a rival._

_(To be Continued, oh my!)_

_I wonder if Bea would be mad at me for making her my rival? I guess she kinda is, but I don't want to hurt her feelings. Well, 'till tomorrow Diary!_

"Bea isn't mad. Bea is confused."

"Why is that?" Hana asked, curious as to why she was speaking in third person. She gave a small yawn. "Mm.. I'll tell you later if I see you again. It's past my bedtime. If I keep getting up late like I have been, I won't be much of a farmer." She chuckled, standing.

"Night Bea! Nice meeting you."

"Night."

Noticing she was otherwise alone on the beach, other then the fact that she was sitting on Chase, she giggled. "I suppose you'd like to go home too?"

"I'd prefer it. I'm late for work."

"Well, I won't keep you any longer then. Watch out for Gill." She smiled, standing up. He gave a small nod of thanks.

"Yep. Be careful walking home." He called back, before trekking towards the Sundae Inn.

**[House]**

Bea had found herself exhausted as she trekked into the door of her house.. Ah, home sweet-

Wait, who went through her house when she was away? The place looked like a tornado hit it? And her bed.. What were those two lumps?... EEP! They moved!?

"H-hello?" She squeaked nervously, half expecting an animal to jump out.

Close enough. It was Calvin and Phoebe. What they were doing, she didn't particularly care to know about. "I REGRET NOTHING!" The man declared, scooping up his hat up from under the table, snatching a fangirlishly squealing Phoebe, and using a boot to break out through the window.

Bea stared for a moment, brain unable to register what had just happened here. It took a few minutes, but finally, she understood.

Note to self; buy a lock, ask Ramsey to weld a new window, and maybe buy a new bed. She certainly didn't want to sleep in her own tonight.

**((To be continued..))**


	7. Is This a Revolution?

AT LONG LAST, CHAPTER 7 IS HERE~

Okay, it's been here for a while, buuuuut you didn't know that. 3;

...WOT. THERE IS A LACK OF DAIRY HERE? INCONCEIVABLE!

Well, there's Juli, so it's cool, right…? -shot-

**[House]**

_….and the weather tomorrow will be sunny and hot all day. Be sure to bring protection and keep hydrated- it's going to be a scorcher!_

Bea stared at the little picture of Elli, appropriate for the screen of her low-def TV, her eyes squinted in a lazy fashion to see the picture, making her appear almost zombie like. Glancing back at the clock on the wall (which had mysteriously changed places without her doing) she took note that it was about 12 PM.

Deciding that she probably had to get up tomorrow, she yawned and laid down in bed… To find it warmer then usual. Feeling a sudden burst of hot air on her neck, she turned around to see Luke suddenly crouched next to her with a mischievous grin. "Heya. It's about time. If you're a good girl, I'll make you a Shining Box Lunch tomorrow, 'kay?"

Bea opened her mouth to say something, but she was tackled off to the side. The last thing she saw was a blur of blue hair as she felt herself being shoved down against the covers of her bed… (Which was meant for one, mind you)

…Which quickly changed randomly into a winged maiden decided to grace the farmer with her presence. Again. Standing back up and smiling politely, her eyes turned to the heavens, her expression quickly changed to that of pain and sadness, letting her hands fall around to her waste area. In a pretty, but very quiet voice, she spoke-

_"……..Nausea……. Hea….rtburn…. Indi…gestion…….. Upset….stoma….ch…… Dia…………riah…. Peptol……………..Bis……….mol…….plea……..se."_

With that, she once again began to fade. The sacred message having been said, it was now time for Bea to arise and act on the situation.

**[House (NO, SERIOUSLY THIS TIME!)]****  
**  
Bea's eyes snapped open to the sound of twittering birds outside the broken window. Forcing herself to sit up and look around, she found herself completely alone in the house, with everything just the way she left it. Puzzled, she yawned and stretched, hopping out of bed. "I'd like to have seen how that'd end, actually."

Finding that her own thoughts were confusing, she gave a small "Let's go!" and trotted out to the general direction of the door. Breakfast was out of the question- she had chores to do, windows to purchase (the broken glass had been swept up, but that did nothing to stop the draft), and choice questions dealing with mind rape to ask Luke.

Well, until she ran into a mysteriously strangely shaped wall, which fell over with an "Oof!" on impact.

"…Gill? What are you doing here…? Is everything all right?"

The blonde shuffled and looked down at his elf shoes, fidgeting a bit. He sighed. "I came… To apologize for yesterday. Clearly, I took Luke's antics a bit too seriously, and ended up hounding you and Chase for his faults." He paused a moment, chuckling. "Why, I was so blind with rage, I could have sworn I saw you two run over a rainbow with Daren."

Now it was Bea's turn to fidget. Smiling politely, she scratched the back of her head, uttering a nervous giggle. "Mm'hmm.. It's okay. Luke is a bit annoying sometimes."

Gill smiled. "I'm pleased that we have an understanding. I've brought you a small gift as a token of our friendship. Here." With that, the mayor's son placed a rather large chunk of gold ore in the girl's hands, immediately causing her to light up like a Christmas tree. Figuratively, of course. "W-why thank you so much Gill.." She stammered out, Gill giving a small nod.

"Think nothing of it. Well, I've taken too much of your time. I must be going."

Looking between the parting Gill and the gift she had just received in silence, Bea had only one thing to say as she darted off towards Ramsey's Place in the Ganache Mine District.

"Look at the size of that rock!"

**[Ramsey the Blacksmith]**

"Sorry dear, but it's only Scrap Iron."

"Wha? It's… _fake_?"

Mira gave a small chuckle at the flabbergasted, slack-jawed expression of the farmer upon hearing her results of the refinement. "I'm afraid so. Only Fool's Gold.. What's done is done, I suppose."

Handing back the final product to Bea, she stepped over to a nearby sink to wash the excess dirt and rock that decided to cling to her hands during the refinement. Bea sighed, sticking the chunk of metal into her rucksack to sell later or something before turning away.

"Ah… That jerk. Getting my hopes up for nothing."

"Well, it's usually the thought that counts~ " A voice rang out in her head, which provoked a small nod. That was true- he didn't owe her anything, he gave it to her from the….uh, goodness…. Of his heart…

Then it struck her- _she didn't think in Lucky Charms_! Glancing back, she noticed a smiling, multi-colored-but-mostly-purple haired… man (right?) standing beside her, smiling.

"Glad to see you agree. So did you just come here for that, or..?"

She shook her head. "Actually, I was going to ask Ramsey to make me a new window." She explained, glancing around. "Where is he anyway?"

"He's gone to deliver some tools that Dale ordered. Chloe and Owen went off to play in the mines, so he had to do it himself." He chucked. "Though he'll probably stay a while there. Those two are good friends… Why do you need a new window anyway?"

Bea, who was taking three steps towards the door, stopped completely in her tracks, shuddering a bit. "Do you really want to know?" Please don't say yes, please don't--

He nodded. "But of course! I'm curious now~ "

Bea sighed. "I'll explain it on the way, if you want to come." Please don't want to come…

"Oh, but I do! I don't have anything else to do today." He chuckled. "Mira will be fine if we get any orders. Now, what happened…?"

It would be at least six hours before Julius's face returned to its normal color. Bea's explanation had lost no description from within the five minutes or so spent between coming in the door and watching the window exit. Pervert…

**[Dale's Carpentry]**

"Luke? What's up with your face?"

Bo blinked, looking rather confused as opposed to joking-like. Luke returned the quizzical glance, trying to think of what he meant.

"What do you mean?...." He paused when it hit him. "Oh, you mean the band aid? That's gone! My nose is fixed!" He smiled triumphantly, poking his nose. Noticing Bea walking towards the building, he smirked. "I'm gonna go show her how great I am!"

With that, he dashed towards the door. Though he wasn't quite expecting to see the door fly at him at full force, slamming him in the face and knocking him backwards onto the floor.

Juli blinked, still flustered from the story. "O-oh my. The doorstop is placed awfully close, isn't it?" He commented, Bea giving a small nod of agreement while Luke wallowed by the door on his back.

"Ow… By nose… I tink yew brook it…agan." He cried, Bo sighing and ushering him into the general direction of the first aid kit. Who needs Jin?

….

"So, Ramsey, do you think you could make me a window?"

The elder man blinked, looking away from where he was once talking to Dale. The carpenter may have seen his son's nose broken several times before, but that's no excuse to be a bad father. "What for? Did one break?"

"Actually, yes. There's a whole story behind it if you must know." Juli added, still red in the face. Ramsey gave him a quizzical look before returning his gaze to Bea. "…I don't need to know the details. I'll be over later to take the measurements."

Bea gave a small bow. "Thank you so much! Do you… think you can make me a lock, too?"

Ramsey expression darkened for a minute. "You may want to sleep on that one for a bit, Missy."

"**WHAT** is that tranny doing in my house?"

The semi-casual conversation was broken when a screaming, and once again nose-bandaged Luke ran in, pointing a threatening finger at Julius. The purple haired man raised an eyebrow. "Is… That how you treat all your guests?"

Luke folded his arms, but somehow continued pointing. Wonder how he did that? "Only the feminine non-female ones." He grumbled, Juli seeming to pick up on the mood. "W-why that's madness!"

_"__Madness?__"_

There was a strange silence in the room as Juli and Luke glared daggers at each other. Bea backed away to avoid getting in on the crossfire. Finally Luke spoke, gaze cast downwards.

"This…"

Juli blinked. "This….is…?"

**"****DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION!**"

Luke yelled out, two sets of four arrows pointing in the compass directions breaching the fourth wall and floating a few feet above the two competitors' heads. Bea reached out to touch one, but quickly withdrew her hand with a yelp upon getting zapped with a small electrical shock.

Having heard Luke's yell, which seemed to shake the entire household business, Bo ran back into the room carrying a radio. Glancing at Bea's hand for a moment, he frowned. "Would you like some salve for that?"

She shook her head, giving Bo a smile. "It's fine. What's--"

"I challenge you to a dance off, _tranny_! Loser gets out of the house!"

…Oh.

Juli smirked, now appearing confident, which was offset by the reddish hue in his face. "I accept, if I can pick the song."

Luke, who clearly just wanted this man out, stuck his tongue out. "Fine." Juli waved down Bo. "'Butterfly' if you please." Bo gave a small nod and clicked "play" on the radio.

Luke twitched. "Wha..?"

_Ay, iyaiyai,__  
_  
Bea simply stared as two of those strange message box things appeared, one reading "score" and the other appearing to be something like her stamina bar appeared to the sides and bottom of where Juli and Luke had taken their positions.

_Ay, iyaiyai,_

"Ready…. ?" Bo stated, Taylor's head appearing at the window as he stared into the house.

_A-a-a iyaiyai_

"GO!"

Bea stared, absolutely lost when a flurry of rainbow arrows shot out of nowhere as the two began dancing. She only heard a few more words before she felt herself grow faint…

_Where's my samurai?_

**[Ganache Mine District]**

What she guessed to be a few minutes later, Bea found herself slumped over the steps of the carpenter's house. Beside her was a rather deflated Luke, muttering about how Juli cheated and the fact that he was kicked out of his own house. Upon seeing that she was awake, he grinned and looked over. "Well? Pretty intense, right?"

"I suppose…"

He chuckled. "Well, you DID black out. Bo laid you out here because we didn't feel like dancing with an unconscious person in the room." Bea frowned. "Tell me to thank him later." She groaned, her tone oozing with sarcasm.

Luke seemed to fail to pick up on this. "Well, wanna go see Chase? I feel like I missed out on somethin' when Gill went hella crazy there." He commented, standing up and offering Bea a hand. Hesitating, she took the help up, only to nearly get slammed on the back of the head with the door. "What are you two up to?~ "

Well, he seemed to be somewhat back to normal now as far as speech goes. Luke stuck his tongue out. "Nothing you'd want to--"

"We're reading Gill's Diary. Chase has it, so we're going to see him." Bea smirked, cutting him off. Luke grumbled a few inaudible choice words as Julius clapped his hands in delight.

"That sounds exciting! You wouldn't mind a third wheel, would you?"

"Not at all." Bea smiled, and started off in the general direction of the Maple Lake area, Juli skipping behind her cheerfully. Glancing back, she noticed Luke was still standing around, brooding. "Are you coming?" She called, Luke giving a curt nod before trotting off behind them, hands in his pockets.

Stupid tranny, ruining a perfectly good day.

**(To be continued…)**


End file.
